Miracle

I told Brent that it was a miracle. He was marrying Erica, and I wanted him to know that it was a miracle. A miracle. I don’t think marriage is anything less. I have looked inside myself, I have talked to other people, I have seen what it takes for a couple to grow to the point where they are ready to spend the rest of their lives together, and I have to say that it is nothing but a miracle.

He cried when she walked down the aisle. I almost cried too. It was a beautiful thing, she was beautiful, and what was happening was even more beautiful than her or the lake that we stood in front of. Who do you think about when you see someone else’s fiance walk down the aisle? Who do you see in that white dress? Your latest crush, your last girlfriend, the one that disappeared, the one that got away, the one that you never talked to, the girl you just met? Who?

Who does God see?

A friend told me that he predicts I will get married when I no longer think I need to. He is right. And I am getting there. There is a line, a small line deep as the ocean, that runs between wanting to get married and needing to. Maybe it’s not even needing to, but thinking that you need to…

I just got off the phone with someone and she said that she learned a lot of life lessons through basketball, I always thought that was very cliche when people said that, but maybe if I was able to take more from what I learned in basketball and use it in my life — in situations like this — it would work out better…

1. Don’t force things. Whenever you, I, try to force things in basketball it doesn’t work, it doesn’t give you the result you were hoping for — never. Never. Seeing all of my friends get married is wierd. It makes me want to force things, it makes me want take the game into my own hands and make something happen when there is nothing there to make.

2. Pace yourself. The game is long. Sometimes very long if no one can make any shots. There is no point in using all of my energy in the beginning of the game because then I will have nothing left to give in the end.

There are probably more, like bend your knees and keep your head up while you dribble and follow through on your shot that I could stretch into metaphors but I don’t want to. There is one more actually, I just thought about it: You can’t win a game all by yourself. You need help.

Marriage is a miracle. As I sat with Brent in the room, alone, and told him this, I wasn’t sure if I was saying it for him or for me. God wanted one of us to hear it, probably both of us, because I didn’t want to say it. I wanted to believe that I, I, can make it work. But I haven’t been able to make miracles since I passed stats in college.

~ by kevinthomas on September 29, 2006.